and the winner is . . .

So, here's a little update about that Chinese Speaking Competition.

I almost didn't do it. I was still feeling lousy from my cold on Friday, and I had kind of a bad day at school. I felt like I was too scattered to be able to get up and recite a speech I didn't really know all that well. I just had these visions of myself getting up there, losing my place or forgetting a line because I was so nervous, and then just starting to cry in front of everyone. I think I've mentioned it before, but I kind of seem to cry easily here. I just did not want to start crying in front of a room of people, whose eyes were all on me.

But, my friend Steffi convinced me to suck it up and do it. That's what Germans are for.

There were about eight contestants in the beginners-level competion, which is where I am. (Two years of study in the States does not an Intermediate make.) I was the second one to go up there. The girl before me, one of my classmates, was excellent. Composed. Clear. She took her time and remembered all of it, even though she had a couple small stumbles here and there. Me, not so much. I got really nervous. I lost my place a couple times. I got distracted by people coming in and out of the room, and ultimately left out one small chunk entirely. I had to look at my cheat sheet at the end to rember the final sentence.

But, ah! the relief when it was over! I was so happy to be finished that I almost didn't even care that, toward the end of the competition there were a couple of girls who hadn't even bothered to memorize their speeches. They just read them from a sheet! How fair is that? It's not hard to correctly read pinyin spellings of Chinese words off a piece of paper. If I had known that were an option, I wouldn't have been nervous to begin with! (Okay, so maybe I cared a little bit.)

In the end, the winner was . . . all of us. They gave us all T-shirts and congratulated us on our hard work. Despite the fact that I am a very competitive person who usually likes to see a winner, and usually likes for that winner to be me, that seemed like exactly the right way for that competition to end. I know everyone worked really hard to prepare for that contest, and everyone deserved a reward for the hard work they had invested . . . except for maybe those two girls who didn't memorize.